An important decision lies ahead of me on the first day of Chinese New Year, ie, tomorrow: I have to decide whether to wear shorts or long pants.
In previous years, I have always donned shorts to visit relatives. And I mean decent (in my opinion), almost knee-length shorts, not hot pants or Goldlion boxer shorts - which I still wear of course, but on the inside.
And I do try to wear brand new shorts - it's Chinese New Year after all.
My mother has always been slightly embarrassed by her adult son's exposed calves at family gatherings, but is relieved that I've at least stopped wearing berms to wedding dinners.
The simple reason is that most wedding dinner venues are air-conditioned whereas the homes of my relatives are not.
Another critical factor is footwear. Or more specifically, the custom of removing them prior to entering a relative's home.
Which utterly defeats the purpose of dressing up for the new year.
You may be James Bond sporting the finest tuxedo ever made, but once the shoes come off, you can't help but look like James Dork.
However, if you're wearing shorts, somehow your bare feet don't look so incongruous.
That is, assuming you're taking your socks off as well. Or should you? Since you're not sure if your feet smell worse with or without them.
But remember if you do take off your socks, you have to put them back on again along with your shoes after searching through other people's smelly footwear, a process that you would have to repeat if you're visiting more than one relative's home in a single day.
In which case, it's more convenient to keep your socks on no matter how they smell.
As for me, I skip that whole bourgeoisie socks-and-shoes thing altogether - I wear flip-flops for easy removal and re-application.
And what goes with flip-flops? Shorts!
The dilemma I have this year is that for the first time, I have to return to work in the evening after visiting my relatives tomorrow.
My boss has already made some snide comments when he spotted me wearing shorts in the office once one weekend.
HR has e-mailed a reminder that proper office attire is required during business hours, but it's my belief that weekends and the first day of Chinese New Year don't count count as "business hours".
Still, those snide comments can hurt.
Perhaps I could wear shorts to visit my relatives and then change to long pants at the office? But that would mean I'd have to change from flip-flops to socks and shoes too. Way too much hassle.
What the hell, I may just wear long pants all day and not embarrass my mother for a change. Just hope she doesn't start expecting it every year.
- Published in The New Paper, 25 January 2009
TRENDING POSTS OF THE WEEK
Zoe Tay said she was “just sexy”, and that men love her and women hate her. I can’t speak for women, but as a man, I don’t exactly love...
Let me first say, I love my country. And I dislike the new National Day song, Because It’s Singapore, because it’s not Home — like any t...
It’s like 1996 all over again. Only instead of the Macarena , we’re dancing Gangnam Style . Instead of watching the White House get bl...
For the first time, I limped to the start line. It was The Performance Series Race at Punggol East-Coney Island this morning. I had been...
Two years ago, when celebrity radio deejay Glenn Ong revealed that he was dating fellow MediaCorp deejay Jean Danker after splitting fro...
I first met Darryl David at Gurmit Singh's wedding dinner in 1995. David's date was a woman named Lynette Pang , who was a stag...
Last month, my wife posed for pictures with a topless male model at the entrance of Abercrombie & Fitch on Orchard Road. Because he pu...
It started with this Cyberpioneer Facebook post: What does Military Expert (ME) 1 Clarie Teo enjoy, when she is not busy keeping ship eng...
Okay, I surrender. I admit it. I was wrong. In April last year, I wrote a column called “ So is Joanne Peh really going out with Qi Yuwu? ...
Halimah Yacob did not delete info about Indian descent on Wikipedia page because it's still there unless it has been deleted againOn Wednesday, The Independent Singapore speculated: Did Halimah Yacob delete info about Indian descent from Wikipedia page ? The short ...