Monday 27 October 2014

The 90s called, they want their suits back (Reservoir Dogs tribute video)

Ravi, Roy, Hui Hui & gang outside court this morning: Plea not taken by protesters to public nuisance charges

Now imagine them doing the walk in slo-mo to Little Green Bag like in the 1992 Quentin Tarantino movie Reservoir Dogs.

Hope no one gets their ear sliced off.

UPDATE: Video of Roy Ngerng and gang arriving at court in slo-mo set to Little Green Bag.


Joseph Schooling, Roy and Hui Hui: Maybe we need a Manual Of Obedience

Online petitions: Bad news, good news for Han Hui Hui

Sunday 26 October 2014

On Her Majesty's not-so-secret guest list: How come Ivan Heng got invited & not me?

Okay, I admit it. I’m jealous of Ivan Heng.

The theatre veteran and Cultural Medallion recipient was invited to the state banquet in Buckingham Palace with the Queen in honour of President Tony Tan Keng Yam during his UK visit last week.

And when I say “Queen”, I don’t mean Kumar. I mean Queen Elizabeth II of England.

As my Hokkien wife taught me to say: “Bo jio!”

(As defined by the ever-reliable online bible on Singaporean phrases, Wikipedia, “bo jio” means “you didn’t invite me”.)

Why am I jealous?

Free food!

Granted, it’s British food. But still, free food!

At least, I assume it’s free. I mean, you don’t have to prepare a hongbao, right?

Can you use Singapore dollars or must it be in British pound? Will the euro do?

How much do you give the Queen of England anyway?

Isn’t it enough we have to pay so much to watch English football on TV?

Who am I kidding? I don’t even watch football or give hongbao at wedding dinners.

Wait, wasn’t Heng the same guy whose life was so boring that he spent New Year’s Eve watching TV and complaining about the “cheena” Channel 5 countdown show on Facebook?

And now he gets invited to makan with Kate Middleton’s grandmother-in-law.

What changed between New Year’s Eve and last week that suddenly made him so invitable to royal shindigs hosted by a Helen Mirren impersonator?

Well, in August, Heng married Briton Tony Trickett in London.

I looked at my Hokkien wife disappointedly.

Why couldn’t we have married in England? Why couldn’t she be British? Why couldn’t she be a man?

Is that too much to ask for?

Perhaps Heng was invited by the Queen to make up for Section 377A, which came from the British, our former colonial masters, who repealed the anti-gay law in 1967 in England, yet Section 377A remains in Singapore in 2014.

If only Heng and Mr Trickett had hatched an egg together in a zoo, they could be removed from the library children’s section and placed in the adult section after weeks of controversy.

If they had been an Archie comic book, they would not have been allowed to be imported and distributed in retail outlets.

But if they had been an X-Men comic book, they would not be banned because they offered a balanced treatment on the issue of gay marriage.

Which is good because I bought the X-Men comic book as a present for my daughter’s 15th birthday last month even though she’s more into the Winter Soldier now, thanks to the movie.

Am I the only one who finds the new Avengers: Age Of Ultron teaser trailer kind of “meh”?

Sure, the Iron Man Hulkbuster suit is cool, but everything else seem so superhero generic. A little Blue Swede would’ve hit the spot.

That’s just a sample of the marvellous small talk I would’ve exchanged with the Queen had I been invited to the palace.

Did you see Renee Zellweger’s new face? What happened to her eyes? She doesn’t look like me any more.

I would also show Her Majesty the latest viral videos in Singapore on my new still-unbent iPhone 6.

Like the one where people coming up an escalator were forced into intimate positions with strangers one after another on a packed platform at the Lakeside MRT station.

Can Her Majesty see what SMRT is doing to her loyal Commonwealth subjects?

But I wouldn’t show her the video of an amorous young couple caught in an HDB stairwell perhaps training for a different type of vertical marathon because showing such a thing to the Queen would be inappropriate.

I would also steer the conversation away from the subject of the billion-dollar Singapore Sports Hub and its five-cent pitch, which should be easy to do unless Her Majesty happens to be a Jay Chou fan.

I would talk instead about how Singapore was just named the second best country in the world for expatriates by HSBC and the top country to visit in 2015 by Lonely Planet.

But I wouldn’t point out that the other countries in Lonely Planet’s top 10 – Namibia, Lithuania, Nicaragua, Ireland, Republic of Congo, Serbia, the Philippines, Saint Lucia and Morocco – aren’t exactly on my bucket list as places I want to visit before I die of Ebola.

What a great achievement for Singapore to beat second-place Namibia, a country on the same continent as where the Ebola outbreak started. We should definitely bat ourselves... I mean, pat ourselves on the back for that.

Oops, I’m sorry, Your Majesty. I didn’t mean to ruin your appetite. I’m sure you don’t serve bushmeat here at Buckingham Palace.


Perhaps it’s a good thing I was not invited to the royal banquet after all.

Ivan Heng would definitely make a better guest. He could complain to the Queen about Channel 5’s New Year’s Eve show.

- Published in The New Paper, 26 October 2014

Sunday 19 October 2014

Open letter to Gurmit Singh about his open letter-writing daughter Gabrielle

Dear Gurmit,

How’s it going?

It’s been a while. The Phua Chu Kang movie didn’t turn out the way I hoped.

You look good for a guy a year older than me. Still hitting the gym?

I feel old.

I shouldn’t say that since there are older people who must be feeling older. I know how annoying it is to hear people younger than you complaining about feeling old.

Even when you’re 80, you can’t complain about feeling old because there’ll be someone 90 years old saying, “Old? You have no idea what feeling old means, you young punk!”

But I felt particularly old last week when I read about your daughter Gabbi’s open letter to Forever 21, calling out the misogynistic rap song being played in a clothing store targeted at women.

It’s cool that Forever 21 has apologised, explaining: “A staff member had played his own personal list, which was not part of the company recommendations.”

Gabbi reminds me of the Hwa Chong girl who wrote the open letter to her principal about the “sexist” relationship workshop in her school.

With young people like these, there may be hope for Singapore’s future after all.

As you can see, I’m also jumping on the public missive bandwagon by writing this open letter to you.

Kids. They grow up so fast.

I still think of Gabbi as the baby I saw when I visited you in your HDB flat in Woodlands in the 90s. And now she’s using words like “misogynistic”, “bitches” and “fellatio” in her open letter.

I can faint.

By the way, remember when you were still living in HDB? How crazy was that?

Would a Lamborghini fit into a standard HDB parking lot?

Just kidding!

Hey, I went through a mid-life crisis too. You bought an Italian supercar, I bought skinny jeans.

But you’ve replaced the Lambo with an Audi S5, right? I saw it on Instagram.

I also read on your Instagram that Gabbi has published a book of her poetry called Anomic Aphasia.

And she’s only 17!

That’s seriously impressive. I had to look up what “anomic aphasia” means. (It’s a medical condition where you can’t recall names.)

I’m still waiting for someone to publish my book of song lyrics I wrote in secondary school. And I’m 48!

My son is still working on his never-ending space fantasy epic which I’m afraid to read. I blame Adrian Pang for encouraging him to be a writer.

Which brings me to the real reason I’m writing you this letter.

No, not kill Adrian Pang.

As you may or may not know, my son was born in the same year as Gabbi. I remember thinking at the time how cool it would be if they grew up, started dating and got married – then you and I could be in-laws!

Well, it’s now 17 years later. They’re sort of at the age when they can start dating.

I was wondering... you know.

I know what you’re thinking – is my son worthy of dating your daughter?

Probably not.

I mean, he’s no Irfan Fandi, who’s also 17 and was just named one of the 40 best young talents in world football by The Guardian newspaper in UK.

But then at 1.86m, Irfan is way too tall for Gabbi.

My son, on the other hand, is about your height, which your daughter should be used to.

And frankly, I would make a better in-law than Fandi Ahmad. I would let you beat me at football.

Just like how Fandi let all those other teams beat his LionsXII.


Also, my son doesn’t like rap. He prefers Chinese orchestral music and there’s no such thing as misogynistic Chinese orchestral music.

Admittedly, he might have listened to Baby Got Back by Sir Mix-A-Lot a little too often because he kept rewatching the episode of Friends with that song on Blu-ray.

But he’s never all about the bass. Or treble.

He will never refer to anyone as a “pink fat lady” since he doesn’t work at Pizza Hut.

You may have read somewhere (my column last week) that my son can get pretty surly, but that’s only to me, his father.

Rest assured that to other people, he’s much, much, much less surly.

An introduction – that’s all I’m asking for after 20 years of acquaintance.

I may sound a bit desperate, but that’s because my wife and I are afraid no one will ever marry my son and we have nightmares about being stuck with him for the rest of our lives.

Yes, Gabbi deserves better, but so do we.

Just think about it. No pressure.

And please apologise to your wife, Melissa, for me. I didn’t mean to snub her at the PCK series wrap party at Zouk in 2007. I didn’t realise it was her until after I snubbed her.

Good luck with the President’s Star Charity show next month.

All the best in Singapore and JB,

PS: Would you happen to know how old Kheng Hua's daughter is now?

- Published in The New Paper, 19 October 2014

EARLIER: My son attended 'sexist' relationship workshop & survived!

UPDATE: My blog had 6 followers, I thought no one was going to see it

Saturday 18 October 2014

Is Taufik Batisah truly Singapore's idol?

"Ten years after being crowned Singapore Idol, Taufik Batisah is still on top of his game."

That line in The Straits Times FB post got wondering: Exactly what "game" is Taufik on top of?

Is it the game of being a Malay-language pop star? Then yes, he certainly seems "on top" of it, having won the Most Popular Song (Singapore), Most Popular Artist and Social Media Icon awards at the Malay music awards show, Anugerah Planet Muzik last night.

But if the "game" is being a Singapore Idol, then I would say not quite.

My impression is that the objective of Singapore Idol was to find an English-language pop star.

Since English is the common language among the different races here, it makes sense that to be a truly Singapore's idol, you should be an English-language pop star.

Which was why SI was shown on Channel 5, an English-language channel. The Malay, Tamil and Chinese-language TV channels have their own talent shows.

After winning the first Singapore Idol in 2004, Taufik released his first album, Blessing, which was an English album. His second album, All Because of You, was a mix of English and Malay songs. His next three albums were all Malay.

The second Singapore Idol, Hady Mirza, who won in 2006, followed practically the same path but accelerated - his first album was mostly English but already contained one Malay song. His next album, Sang Penyanyi, was all Malay.

Take Two, the English-language first album of the third Singapore, Sezairi Sezali, who won in 2009, came and went in 2010. Last year, he was courting the Malay market with the single Sayang.

Yes, I know there's no market for a local English-language recording artist.

The only one I can think of who has made any lasting impact in recent decades is... Dick Lee?

Kit Chan may be known for singing Dick Lee's Home, but her career was built on her Mandarin recordings. Ditto Stephanie Sun, Tanya Chua and JJ Lin.

If any of the Singapore Idol winners had been Chinese, one suspects he or she would eventually record Mandarin songs too.

But wasn't the premise and promise of the three Singapore Idol competitions (where Dick Lee was a judge) and last year's already forgotten The Final 1 was to find a break-out English-language singing star and change the market?

I feel misled.

Thursday 16 October 2014

Singapore goes viral - again - thanks to Agatha Tan & 'Pink Fat Lady'

Remember in July when Singapore went a weird hot streak where a series of local news items got international attention?

I'm talking about the NLB gay penguins tango, the Archie gay wedding comic book ban and the anti-gambling World Cup ad starring Andy.

It seems to be happening again this month.

Starting small, the first is not quite local news, but it involves a Singaporean, cartoonist Heng Kim Song, whose NYT cartoon received some backlash:
BBC: India Mars Mission: New York Times apologises for cartoon

Indiatimes: New York Times Issues Apology For Racist Cartoon On India's Mars Mission

Business Standard: Online anger forces NYT to apologize for 'racist' cartoon

We also had the To Singapore, With Love movie controversy (although technically this started last month):
New York Times: Banned Film Reunites Singapore With Its Exiles

The Independent (UK): Have you heard about the film Singapore has banned its people from watching? Well, you have now

Huffington Post: For Yale in Singapore, It's Deja-vu All Over Again

Then came Hwa Chong student Agatha Tan's open letter about a "sexist" relationship workshop in school:
Buzzfeed: A Teen’s Open Letter About Her School’s Sexist Sex-Ed Class Is Going Viral

Huffington Post: 17-Year-Old Spells Out Everything Wrong With Her Lousy Sex Ed Class

Jezebel: Badass Teen Pens Letter Against Focus on the Family Sex Ed Workshop

And of course Pizza Hut's 'Pink Fat Lady' receipt:
Buzzfeed: Pizza Hut Apologizes For Calling A Woman A “Pink Fat Lady” On Her Receipt

Time: Pizza Hut Singapore Apologizes for Calling Customer ‘Pink Fat Lady’ on Receipt

Gawker: Pizza Hut Customer Says They Called Her "Pink Fat Lady" on a Receipt

I expect the open letter by Gurmit Singh's daughter to Forever 21 about misogynistic rap songs to appear on Jezebel some time soon.

I would love to see John Oliver's take on that.

PS: No one outside Singapore seems to care about Singapore Sports Hub's grass problem.

UPDATE: Unexpectedly, it is the local news item about a Singapore fisherman catching a basket star that has gone viral internationally.
Huffington Post: Bizarre Sea Creature Caught In Singapore Looks Like Kraken Come To Life

Salon: Check out the terrifying deep-sea creature someone pulled out of the ocean

USA Today: Fisherman catches terrifying creature off the coast of Singapore

Tuesday 14 October 2014

To Singapore with history: Now imagine Lim Kay Tong as Lee Kuan Yew

The Battle For Merger reprint.

The battle for To Singapore, With Love.

Lim Kay Tong cast as Lee Kuan Yew in the upcoming movie 1965.

It won't be given an NAR classification by MDA like To Singapore, With Love because the $2.8 million-budget 1965 is "supported" by MDA under its Production Assistance Scheme, which means money.

Yes, Singapore taxpayers, see where your money is going.

With all this revisiting of Singapore's history, I decided to do some revisiting myself on YouTube.

First up, the 2005 three-part Discovery channel documentary, The History Of Singapore, produced to coincide with the nation's 40th birthday.

This next video is from the DVD that accompanied the book Chronicle Of Singapore (50 Years Of Headline News) 1959-2009.

Finally, someone edited together the scenes of Lim Kay Tong as a communist from the 1989 Australian TV mini-series Tanamera: Lion of Singapore. (Don't miss the surprise ending where he's apparently shot by a ...)

Talk about revisionist history.

Sunday 12 October 2014

Complicated: My son attended 'sexist' relationship workshop & survived!

I know I’m not a very good parent.

But I didn't realise the depths of my suckitude until last week.

I have a son in the first year of junior college like Agatha Tan, the Hwa Chong Institution student whose open letter to her principal went viral.

Her letter expressed “sincere concerns” about an Oct 4 relationship workshop called “It’s UNcomplicated” conducted in her school.

She said the accompanying booklet taught her that “bigotry is very much alive" and it was naïve of her to think she could be safe from it even in school.

So she did learn something from the workshop.

I’m such a terrible parent that I wasn't even sure if my son knew what “bigotry" meant.

He sounded rather insulted when I asked him.

“You know, I did study the book The Chrysalids in secondary school and it was all about bigotry,” he said.


I pretended I remembered what The Chrysalids was about.

I was so afraid of annoying him any further that I took him at his word.

Yes, I’m such a terrible parent that I'm afraid of my own offspring. He’s taller than me and can get pretty surly.

I quickly looked up The Chrysalids. The book by John Wyndham is about some kid getting into trouble in some future society because he or she is “different”. It might as well be called Divergent. Or The Giver. Or Astro Boy.

In a way, Agatha is also “different”.

According to Focus On The Family Singapore, more than 14,000 young people have attended its workshop since it started last year.

And none of those 14,000 young people wrote an open letter three times longer than this article complaining about the workshop.

Except Agatha.

She is clearly Divergent and Shailene Woodley should play her in a movie.

If Woodley isn’t available, get Lim Kay Tong.

In Agatha's letter, she used such fancy words like “binary model of a nuclear family", “binary heterosexual norm" and “polyamorous individuals".

Why can't my son use fancy words like that?

Or can he?

I dare not ask.

I’m such a terrible parent that I almost wished I could trade in my son for Agatha.

I hope she’s not the surly type.

In response to her letter, the principal of Hwa Chong Institution, Dr Hon Chiew Weng, wrote in an internal school circular sent out on Thursday:
“One lesson we can learn from this episode is that even if a programme is approved by both MSF (Ministry of Social and Family Development) and MOE (Ministry of Education), things can go wrong."
Way to throw two ministries under the bus, Dr Hon.

The principal also blamed the workshop facilitator, calling him “ineffective” as “several students objected to various viewpoints, and (the male facilitator) was not able to address their concerns satisfactorily”.

Agatha had criticised the workshop facilitator in her letter for his "joking" sexist attitude and "shutting down" another participant who raised an issue.

On Friday, Focus On The Family Singapore responded:
“As Focus is an external service provider, our facilitators are instructed to adhere to approved content. Our facilitators’ efforts to stay on track may have been misunderstood as imposing certain views and that the facilitator is unconcerned with students’ questions.”
So the company’s defence is that there was a misunderstanding between the students and the facilitator teaching the students how to avoid misunderstanding between the sexes. Irony alert!

Where do these facilitators come from anyway?

Can anyone be a facilitator?


According to the Focus On The Family Singapore website, all you had to do to be selected was send in an online application form, attend a 10-minute selection interview and participate in a $300 two-day training session.

You even get a certificate.

And voila! More than 14,000 young minds at your disposal.

Wait a minute.

Is my son one of those 14,000 young minds?

I’m such a terrible parent that I have little idea what my son does in school.

This time, I braced myself, gritted my teeth, bit the bullet, girded my loins, screwed my courage to the sticking place and asked him.

He thought about it for a while and said that he vaguely recalled attending something in school a few months ago with the word “complicated” in it.

That was the “It’s UNcomplicated” workshop!

Alamak, was he also exposed to the casual gender stereotyping? It’s worse than being exposed to Ebola.

Was he told to “conform to traditional gender roles” instead of being his own person as described by Agatha in her letter?

Was he taught that “the acceptance of diversity in people is unimportant”?

Did he read the booklet that “actively serve to promote rape culture in school”?

Did he learn that “no” means “yes”?

Was he going to start referring to girls as “gals”?

My son said that he barely remembers anything from the workshop because he wasn’t paying attention. He was busy doodling on the booklet they gave out.


That’s a relief.

For once, being a slacker might have been to his advantage.

I may not be such a terrible parent after all.

- Published in The New Paper, 12 October 2014

Tuesday 7 October 2014

Cartoonist Heng Kim Song in New York Times: Not so heng, but racist?

Yesterday, the New York Times apologised on Facebook for running this editorial cartoon about India's Mars mission.

Who knew the Grey Lady has been running cartoons by a Singaporean?

I'm very impressed by Mr Heng Kim Song (not to be confused with Quah Kim Song the footballer). I mean, how many Singaporeans get to have their work published by an organisation like NYT? That's a big deal.

But then Mr Heng has been a cartoonist for 30 years. His work has even been shown in an art gallery.

It's a pity that I noticed him only after one of his cartoons was accused of being racist.

I've never heard of him before yesterday, even though he has been praised by Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong on Facebook.

PM even posted a picture with the cartoonist last year.

I feel bad for Mr Heng that after decades of good work, this NYT controversy is what he'll be most famous for from now on.

Actually, it would be amazing if this is really his first controversy. How did he manage to avoid one for so long?

From my own experience, I know that in this line of work (ie content creation), offending people is an inevitability. The offendees could be Adam Lambert fans or CNY fans. (Not Crosby, Nash & Young fans.) It's par for the course, as they say.

There are some who say that if you're not pissing anyone off, then you're not doing your job properly (ie being creative, pushing the envelope).

But no one sets out to offend anyone.

Perhaps provoke and shock on occasion, but no one likes to get complaints.

And no one especially wants to be called racist.

So is the cartoon really racist?

Well, it does stereotype Westerners as fat, balding old men.

But I think the intended meaning of the cartoon is nicely summed up in this tweet:

Ultimately, whether you and I think it's racist doesn't matter. Enough people were offended by Mr Heng's cartoon that an NYT editor had to apologise for it.

And because the cartoonist is Singaporean, the offendees (mostly Indians) naturally have to take a dig at Singapore.

Hey, isn't Singapore embarking on our own space programme too?

To even the score, an Indian cartoonist can draw something to make fun of that.


In an interview with The New Paper, Mr Heng said he has received threats because of the cartoon.

“I started receiving many posts and messages on my Facebook and Linkedin accounts. They were abusive, curt and filled with vulgarities. One of them even said they wanted to tear me apart.”

He explained that the cartoon was inspired by something he read and a photo of a bullock cart transporting a satellite part in the 1980s.

“I was trying to portray India’s engineering success, despite the odds stacked against them.”

He was shocked and saddened by criticism. “I always try to be respectful in portraying issues," he said. “In future, I will be more cautious about culturally-sensitive representations.”

The Straits Times: Award-winning cartoonist receives flak and support over NYT cartoon

2017 UPDATE:

Sunday 5 October 2014

Joseph Schooling, Roy and Hui Hui: Maybe we need a Manual Of Obedience

Not quite The Anarchist Cookbook.

There’s something oxymoronic about a Manual Of Disobedience.

It’s like “Hey, you want to be disobedient? Fine. But you have to obey this manual about how to be disobedient.”

Before violence broke out on Friday, this manual was attributed as the reason the Occupy Central With Love and Peace (OCLP) demonstrators in Hong Kong are the “world’s politest protesters”.

Courtesy is apparently their way of life.

Who needs Singa the Courtesy Lion when they have the Manual Of Disobedience?

They reportedly picked up the litter after a hard day's night of being tear-gassed by the police, even making the effort to recycle.

Singaporeans reading this must be asking, “Really?”

Sure, the fine for littering in Hong Kong is HK$1,500 (S$250), but it’s not like they have the Corrective Work Order.

Are they just trying to make us look bad?

For all our “clean and orderly” reputation, Singaporeans can’t even clear our own trays after we eat.

Maybe we need a Manual Of Obedience.

And Joseph Schooling should be forced to memorise it.

The 19-year-old Asian Games medal-winning swimmer got into a little trouble for allegedly returning to the Athletes’ Village in Incheon, South Korea, very late and intoxicated with two other swimmers last month.

Who knows exactly what happened? No video has surfaced. They could be out heckling special-needs children.

Hypothetical question: If Schooling had participated in the “Singapore in Solidarity with HK event” at the Speakers’ Corner at Hong Lim Park on Wednesday night, would he have been investigated by the police?

You know, since “only Singapore citizens and permanent residents are allowed to participate in demonstrations held at the Speakers’ Corner”.

And enough people say Schooling is a foreigner that his father felt compelled to make a video to deny it.

The Manual Of Obedience should include this instruction just for the swimmer: “Do not be a Eurasian and speak with an American accent or some Singaporeans are going to call you a foreigner.”

If only he threw in a few “lahs” and “lehs” at the end of his sentences, he wouldn’t have this problem.

Or he could protest at Speakers’ Corner about being called a foreigner since he’s allowed to do so since he’s not a foreigner to prove that he’s not a foreigner.

In which case, the OCLP’s Manual Of Disobedience can provide some helpful advice.

It contains such instructions for protesters as “demonstrate virtues of higher standard than those of the suppressors, so as to gain the support of the society”.

And “display a peaceful and rational attitude with dignity”.

And “avoid wearing contact lens”.


That’s a good tip. If you think getting tear-gassed is bad, getting tear-gassed with contact lenses on is much worse.

Unfortunately, the Manual Of Disobedience doesn’t say anything about not heckling special-needs children.

Actually, the advice for protesters should be: Do not appear to be heckling special-needs children even though you’re not.

On further consideration, the advice should be: Just stay away from special-needs kids.

The Return Our CPF protesters at Hong Lim Park last weekend learnt that lesson a little too late - that is, if they even acknowledge it.

Despite all the videos that emerged showing what really happened on Sept 27, there is still debate over what really happened that day in the park. It’s like Rashomon at 360p or better.

The only thing the videos confirm is that a lot of video was shot at the event.

But the video that was widely shared online early on was one entitled “Hong Lim Park protesters heckle special-needs children from YMCA”.

And thus Hecklegate was born.

Poor YMCA. Where are the Village People when you need them?

One wonders if it’s still fun to stay at the Y.

So did the protesters really heckle the kids?

Remember the photo of the woman defecating outside Holland Village MRT station that went viral recently?

No one heckled her in person, but many immediately assumed she was a Chinese national. It didn’t matter that she was later identified as a “Singaporean with a long history of schizophrenia and intellectual disability”. That first impression stuck.

Likewise, it no longer matters whether the protesters actually heckled the children on stage. They’re now stuck with always having to deny that they did.

Hey, at least they weren’t tear-gassed.

Both the Return Our Protest protest leaders, Mr Roy Ngerng and Miss Han Hui Hui, were wearing glasses. Good. That means they weren’t wearing contacts.

So perhaps they did read the Manual Of Disobedience.

Too bad they skipped the part about displaying a peaceful and rational attitude with dignity.

But there’s no need to feel down.

Pick yourself off the ground.

There’s a place you can go where you will find many ways to have a good time.

But you better hurry because The Butter Factory will be closing for good in March next year.

Maybe you’ll see Joseph Schooling there.

- Published in The New Paper, 5 October 2014


Online petitions: Bad news, good news for Han Hui Hui

When you've lost Mr Brown, you've lost mainstream Singapore