Monday 1 May 2017

Income Eco Run half marathon: What's my excuse this time?

It's always something.

For the Marina Run, I was recovering from an injury.

For the 2XU Compression Run, it was blisters from running without socks.

For yesterday morning's Income Eco Run (formerly NTUC Income Run 350), it was diarrhoea.

Or at least, that was what I thought it was.

As I approached the Stadium MRT station, I wanted to go to the toilet there but changed my mind when I saw other runners heading towards it because I didn't want to have to wait in line.

I convinced myself that I could hold it and use it as motivation to run faster to the finish line.

My priority was still hitting my target time.

But just a few minutes later, I regretted not stopping at the MRT station as I felt like I was going to explode.

When I ran past the entrance of Gardens by the Bay East, I saw what looked like a sign for the men's restroom.

So I veered off course only to see the sign was actually an "i" for information counter.

But I took a chance and ran farther in and was overjoyed to find a toilet. It was empty too. So I didn't have to wait in line.

I hurriedly went into a stall and let go.

Very loudly.

As it turned out, I didn't have diarrhoea after all. It just was a huge wet fart.

I quickly wiped myself and returned to the race.

A few minutes later, I felt the pressure in my bowels again. Dammit!

Whether it was diarrhoea or a wet fart, I couldn't let go because I didn't want liquid coming out of my ass while I was running.

And I still had half the half marathon to go.

This time I forced myself to keep it in.

I believe these were the 2 hour 30 minute pacers (with the balloons) who overtook me.

Guess what this girl in the clown wig was giving out.

She was giving out energy chews and I was delighted to get this old-school ice pop from her buddies.

It was sweet and refreshingly cold and really hit the spot.

I didn't even care how it might affect my digestive problem.

The sight of these 2 hour 45 minute pacers behind me gave me hope that I could still make my target time of 2 hours 40 minutes.

According to my Runkeeper and Strava apps, this was my best half marathon time.



Imagine how much better my time would've been if not for the toilet break.

There appeared to be fewer participants than in the 2XU Compression Run, so the Income Eco Run felt less like a clusterfuck.

But this whole "eco run" idea seemed rather half-heartedly executed compared to the Green Race where no disposable cups were used and the finisher's medal was made of wood.

Whereas the Income Eco Run medal is only "partially made from recycled materials".

Still, the Income Eco Run was the most pleasant experience of the three half marathons I've joined this year.

Well, except for the wet farts.