Sunday 14 August 2011

Why I must check Facebook during the National Anthem

Hi, my name is S M Ong and I’m addicted to the Internet.

During the singing of the National Anthem at the National Day Parade. I was using my iPhone to check how many “Likes” I had on my Facebook page.

Fortunately, I was watching the NDP on TV in The New Paper newsroom and I wasn’t caught on video looking at my phone when I should be belting out Majulah Singapura with my hand on my heart like all true Singaporeans.

More fortunately, I’m not a Member of, say, Ms Penny Low.

During The Pledge Moment, I was watching the latest episode of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart at on my desktop PC, which was fortuitous because Stewart actually mentioned Singapore in that particular episode.

He was talking about US investors looking for a safe haven for their money after the US credit rating was downgraded and joked, “Singapore is looking pretty nice this time of year.”

(The line is at 7:43 in the video below.)

Hooray for Singapore's AAA rating!

I was so delighted to hear Singapore mentioned by an American celebrity other than Seth Rogen and Rupert Murdoch (now a US citizen) – on National Day no less – I forgave myself for not saying the Pledge.

The Internet is not only full of such wonderful surprises – I can also use it to affect change.

Remember the faded Singapore flag outside my neighbour’s window I mentioned in last week’s column?

On Monday morning, I posted the article on the Yew Tee Zone 11 Facebook page and within hours, the flag was replaced with a brand new one.

I feel so empowered.

Now I’m wondering if I can use Facebook to find out what kind of TV set another neighbour has.

He lives in a block opposite mine. Even from as far as my block, I can see through the neighbour’s window that it’s the sharpest high-definition TV I have ever laid eyes on.

It makes my own HD TV look like a crayon drawing. Why is the HD TV always sharper on the other side?

I want to know what brand my neighbour’s HD TV is and whether it’s an LCD, LED or plasma TV.

I’m tempted to knock on my neighbour’s door and ask, but I’m afraid it might be a little weird to go to a stranger’s home just to find out what kind of TV he has after coveting it from afar for so long.

Maybe I’ll use the Yew Tee Zone 11 Facebook page instead.

The Internet is so useful that I feel the need to be connected almost all the time.

When I sleep, I have my iPhone beside me so that when I wake up, I can surf the Web right away.

My wife is so frustrated with my addiction that she has forced me to choose between sleeping with her or with my iPhone.

Afraid to go cold turkey, I managed to convince her that our king-size bed is big enough for a threesome.

Have I hit rock bottom yet?

Just let me check my Facebook page one more time. You may carry on with the National Anthem.

- Published in The New Paper, 14 August 2011