Sunday 30 January 2011

Why Marina Bay Sands casino should hire me

Dear Marina Bay Sands,

I’m applying for the position of casino dealer at your esteemed integrated resort as I believe I would make an ideal MBS employee.

Here’s why:

Last week, it was reported that MBS threatened to penalise casino dealers who don’t show up for work during the upcoming Chinese New Year period – even if they have a valid medical certificate.

You have since rescinded this policy.

You were concerned that workers would give themselves a holiday during the holiday as holidays are when the casinos are the busiest.

Apparently, 250 of about 1,500 MBS casino dealers took medical leave on New Year’s Eve.

Understandably, you don’t want that to happen again on Chinese New Year’s Eve.

As an employee, I would not give MBS such headaches.

For one thing, I hate Chinese New Year.

During my full-time national service, I volunteered to be on duty during the first and second day of CNY.

This greatly confused the guys in my unit because CNY duty was what they would normally fight tooth and nail to get out of. The Encik even used CNY duty as a stick to make them do his bidding.

Then I came along and turned the whole thing upside down.

Encik: “If you book in late again, I’ll put you on Chinese New Year duty!”

Yours truly: “Woohoo!”

My fellow servicemen didn’t understand it, but they weren’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth – me being the horse.

To me, CNY duty was just a great – even patriotic – excuse to get out of visiting my relatives, which I still dread doing every year.

My willingness (verging on desperation) to work during CNY is not the only reason you should hire me.

Since I started my current job three years ago, I’ve yet to take a single day of medical leave.

That is not to say I’ve never fallen sick, but I’ve always recovered quickly enough to have never missed a day of work.

And not only do I never take medical leave, I look down on colleagues who do. There’s this guy I’m working with who seems to get sick every time Liverpool loses a match, which is a rather common occurrence nowadays.

I do not agree with the attitude that “Hey, it’s not like I fell sick on purpose”.

I believe it’s every worker’s responsibility to stay healthy to avoid taking medical leave, which is not only a burden to his employer, but also to his or her co-workers.

I want to work for a company that values and rewards a perfect attendance record rather than such trifles as aptitude and a decent haircut.

Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to hearing from you to arrange an interview.

By the way, Chinese New Year's Eve is only three days away. No pressure.

And if you have enough casino dealers, I understand you may have an opening for chief executive officer. I am nothing if not flexible. I don't mind being your CEO if you need someone urgently.

S M Ong

PS: If I don't hear from you soon, I'm applying for a position at Singapore Airlines. I hear the Singapore Girl is making a comeback. I think I'll look fantastic in a kebaya.

- Published in The New Paper, 30 January 2011

UPDATE: MBS hires new CEO