Previously in this column, I described how I went jogging in my Goldlion boxer shorts and accidentally exposed myself.
This week, the sequel.
Afraid of retribution for my inadvertent public indecency, I decided to lay low and leave the country until things cool down.
Since my sister was studying in Seoul, that was enough of an excuse for me to go to Korea on a packaged tour with my family.
And things cooled down immediately as Korea was winter-cold. So we were wearing a dozen pieces of clothing each just to keep from freezing to death. No danger of me accidentally exposing myself there.
On the itinerary was a place called Aqua World, located in a resort at Danyang. It was a huge indoor water park complex that included heated pools and public baths.
The tour guide informed us that to get to the main pool, we had to go through the changing area and public baths which were segregated by sex.
So my wife and daughter went to the female side while my son and I went to the male side. We would meet later at the main pool.
After changing into our swimwear, my son and I made our way to the main pool and walked past the public baths.
Although we were forewarned by the tour guide, nothing could've prepared us for the all-out male nudity suddenly in front of us.
Hair - lots of disgusting hair. On every part of the body that could grow hair.
Even my 11-year-old son, who was accustomed to all manner of psychological abuse simply by being my son, was traumatised by the horrific sight.
We quickly escaped the public baths and eventually reached the main pool area, where we met my wife and daughter who looked similarly culture-shocked.
"There was so much hair!" my wife wailed inconsolably. "And sagging!"
This created the unfortunate image in my mind of naked old saggy-breasted hairy Korean women lounging around the baths, which was even more gruesome than anything I had actually witnessed earlier.
Enough was enough.
That was when I shook my fist at Fate and said:
"I get it! You're punishing me for indecently exposing myself in Choa Chu Kang by indecently exposing Korea to me. I accept that.
"But when you mess with my family, you're crossing the line!"
My family looked around frightened and confused, wondering who I was talking to.
Next week in this column, the climatic conclusion to the Indecent trilogy, The Return Of The Boxers.
Or you can wait for the extended cut on DVD.
- Published in The New Paper, 7 December 2008
TRENDING POSTS OF THE WEEK
Remember in February when SMRT won some international award for “delivering value through risk management”? You should because I wrote a...
A man accosted an MP at a grassroots event because the man was upset that he didn't get what he was there for. No, I'm not talki...
A long time ago, I met Mr Lui Tuck Yew when he was nobody. Okay, he wasn’t exactly nobody at the time. He was the outgoing Chief of Navy. ...
Dear Shaw Theatres, Last Thursday morning, I went to see the giant ape movie Rampage starring Dwayne Johnson at Lido. Of course, I wat...
Dear producers of Code Of Law , My condolences on your new Channel 5 drama series. As a former TV producer for Channel 5 myself, I sympath...
When I learnt that Vernetta Lopez ’s autobiography Memoirs Of A DJ: Life In Progress was published last week, I rushed to the nearest major...
I suppose you’ve heard the big Joanne Peh news by now. I, too, was caught by surprise like everyone else although in retrospect, I should’...
Two years ago, when celebrity radio deejay Glenn Ong revealed that he was dating fellow MediaCorp deejay Jean Danker after splitting fro...
I first met Darryl David at Gurmit Singh's wedding dinner in 1995. David's date was a woman named Lynette Pang , who was a stag...
Last month, my wife posed for pictures with a topless male model at the entrance of Abercrombie & Fitch on Orchard Road. Because he pu...